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when is it time to say goodbye?

Making the decision to say goodbye to a pet is never easy.

Here are some items to consider when facing difficult decisions regarding your dog or cat.

Discuss your wishes ahead of time

Our vets want to make your pet as comfortable and peaceful as possible. They also want to be sure to respect your wishes and desires during this difficult time. A discussion with your vet can help ensure your pet has the best care possible. While they can’t make the hard decisions for you, they can guide on assessing pain and comfort, what options you have, and what to expect. The goal is to help you feel like you have a plan of action and support.

Vet is leaning down to pet a brown dachshund sitting on its owner’s lap.

Pet quality of life scales

Many pet owners find it hard to determine when it’s time to say goodbye. One tool, a quality of life scale, is a form of objective journaling. You record your observations to see if your pet’s symptoms are improving or declining. This can help you and your vet evaluate your pet’s condition and create a baseline for their health care needs.

For each of the following categories, record a rating for your pet. You can choose to do this daily or only on specific days of the week. Just make sure to rate your pet consistently so that you can compare the ratings week to week.

Keep a journal or print out our charting worksheet and bring it to your pet’s vet visits to discuss. Download the charting worksheet

Appetite

1 Not eating/drinking

2 Eating occasionally (treats) < 1 meal per 48 hours

3 Reduced appetite

4 Eating normally

Breathing

1 Extreme effort to breathe, discolored/blue gums, distress

2 Consistently labored or severe episodes

3 Increased rate or intermittent episodes of rapid breath/wheezing/coughing

4 Breathing consistent for pet’s normal behavior

Care Required

1 Constant care for cleanliness, feeding

2 Increased care

3 Senior petcare

4 No additional care the pet’s past year

Demeanor & Energy

1 Actively crying out in pain/minimally responsive/comatose

2 Quiet and desires minimal interaction

3 Quiet but enjoys interaction

4 Interacts, responds to voice, brightens with attention

Family

1 Overwhelmed by care of pet, every day is a struggle, affecting family relationships and daily life negatively

2 Stress present, times of extreme struggle, and starting to affect daily life

3 Minor changes to daily life, actively coping, no concerns on continuing at this level of care

4 Minimal changes, no daily stress or concerns

If you answered “1” for any of these categories, please seek emergency care for your pet immediately.

Preparing to say goodbye to a pet

Here are a few things you can do when time with your pet is limited.

Enjoy time together

Do your best to live in the present and enjoy every moment with your pet. Spend time around their favorite people and pets, do their favorite activities, and document with photos and journaling.

Create a bucket list

Is there anything you wish you could experience with your pet? Make a list of new and favorite experiences and see how much you can accomplish. It can include anything from going camping to an extreme snuggle session on the couch.

Share your french fries

During your pet’s final day, tasty foods that were once off-limits can now be a source of joy. A few french fries from the drive-thru? Some licks of your ice cream cone at the beach? Go for it. For pets who still have an appetite, some families make the last meal the feast of their dreams. Just make sure to check with your veterinarian first on the specifics.

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Make a plan for your pet

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Knowing when to say goodbye to your pet can be difficult. It’s important to involve your veterinary team as they have insight into quality of life measurement, pain management, end of life options, and other resources.

While these life transitions are hard subjects to discuss, it’s important to speak to your veterinarian to discuss your thoughts, desires, and questions for this delicate time. Having a plan can make sure this moment in life is customized for you and your pet.

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